Thursday, September 29, 2011

running.

"It's one of those things. Like church is to some people. Or getting tickets to the symphony. Or watching a sunset. Or drinking wine. It's one of those things that opens up my senses, creates a zone, pulls me out into this bird's eye view where, with every whoosh-whoosh of my breath, every thump-thump of the soles of my shoes to the pavement, every beat of my throbbing pulse...I'm in deep thought. About life. All the crap. All the good stuff. All the dreams and how to get there. And running--burning through that painful place where your sides ache and your breath is deep and your legs are screaming and yet you still pace through the strides--it's a brilliant microcosm of the greater picture. If you can run? You can do anything." kelle hampton

gosh, i love me some kelle hampton. last night while i was up with berkeley, all propped up in the bed feeding him, i got out my phone and saw that there was a new post on "enjoying the small things". my absolute favorite blog of all time. i was so excited that i clicked off my phone and said to myself, "i'm saving that for tomorrow." and i did. tomorrow is now today, and after i fed berkeley, fed roger, took them both on a walk, bathed berkeley and myself, i cozied up with my computer, berkeley snuggled right up against my chest in his sling (the only place he'll quiet and go to sleep), poured a cup of cinnamon vanilla coffee and feasted on her words. while on her site, i found this running quote she wrote last year.
running gives me life. berkeley has left his sleeping newborn phase of life and has entered his awake, active, fussy phase of life. so last night, i passed our baby boy off to derek and went out for a nighttime run. so when i read this today, it hit home. as much as i adore berkeley, getting out and running allows me to be a better mom. it makes me tougher. because if you can run, you can do anything. even stay up all night and day with your needy, but sweet little one.

"i am excited--in that I-can-do-anything, shoes-hitting-the-pavement and breath-fast-and-heavy kind of way. It is amazing how much the human soul can be fueled, inspired, ignited by other human souls and, in turn, reignite the passion, the drive. Like superheros." kelle hampton

Friday, September 23, 2011

berkeley's crib

get it? his crib? like, his home? but crib...cause he's a baby and he sleeps in one...........mmmmmmkay.

after we got berkeley's room just like we wanted it, but before he was born, berkeley's room was THE PLACE TO BE. i mean, we did everything in there. i did my quiet time and dreamed of when he would be in my arms, or sleeping soundly in his bed. derek and i would read in there, and just sit on the floor and talk at night. sometimes, i would go in there just to stare. i'd walk out of the room, and five minutes later, i'd be back in there, staring.

it's actually a bit humorous that we worked so hard to make his room perfect, because until 6 months old, babies are supposed to sleep in your bedroom with you (you know, to prevent SIDS and all that). and by march or april, we'll be moving from our apartment to a house, so really, he didn't even need one.

but none of that matters, because his room is the happiest place in our home.

you see that door below? derek bought that for me for my birthday a year ago. he scoured antique shops to find the perfect one that we intended to use as a headboard for our bed. but instead, i had the idea to paint they lyrics from sleeping at last's 'needle and thread'. i knew before i was even married that i wanted those lyrics to adorn the walls of my little one. and when derek and i were driving to the hospital at 5 am on august 24th, we played that song as tears slid down our faces, because that day, everything would change.

so without further adieu, berkeley's room. it's much messier and more lived in now because of all the diapers and swings and stuff, but that's what room's are for, right?







just us






derek and i are two lucky parents! not only do we have sweet a baby boy, but we have a supportive family all around, just jumping at the chance to hang out with him. and after reading this blog post, i realize how incredible that really is. it may be even more important, seeing that we found out we were having berkeley just two months into our marriage. we had less time than most to just be married, to develop that relationship before becoming a little family.

no matter how much you love your child, time alone with just momma and daddy needs to be a priority to keep the marriage alive. since berkeley has been born (he's one month old!) my parents, my cousin, my aunts, and my mamaw have all taken turns spending time with berkeley so derek and i could have some "us" time. and the wonderful thing is, we haven't ever even asked. each time they offer. and MOST of the time, we accept.
now, that's not to say that there's not a little guilt that accompanies this "us" time. the first time my mom and mamaw fed him a bottle instead of me nursing him, i called and questioned them relentlessly, "so, he took the bottle okay? he liked it? HE DIDN'T MISS ME?". haha. i had it in my mind that he might just refuse anything that wasn't his momma. not true. he's a thriving little boy who is happy just about anywhere!
when i left them with two of my aunts, i was worried, showing them what to do, reminding them how to change his diaper, etc. they gently and quickly reminded me that between the two of them, they had practically reared two sets of twins. (two of my cousins have twins, two boys, two girls). oh right, i forgot, y'all most likely have way more experience than i do in the child rearing department.

so, since august 24, 2011, these are the little adventures derek and i have been on by ourselves:

-while the weather was still summery, we ventured out to the golf course after hours to play frisbee and take a short walk. this was very likely hilarious to watch because it was just a few days after giving birth, and i was in quite a bit of pain. but i just HAD to get outside. i live for being outside.

-we attended a uca game and stopped for the summer's last snow cones on the way home.

-we went on a date to starbucks at uca and then walked around the campus.

-we went to target to spend the last of our baby shower gift cards and bought an adorable pretend fish aquarium thingy to put in berkeley's crib. he adores it and immediately quiets when he sees it. good investment indeed.

-we went to eat bbq for lunch on a weekday.

-we went out to eat at our favorite greek restaurant (or favorite restaurant period), layla's. if you live in conway. GO. THERE. NOW.

and tonight, we have another date night planned. i think we'll spend it relaxing instead of doing. we'll watch the first episodes of 'new girl' and 'whitney' online, and then just cuddle. oh, and sleep. we'll DEFINITLEY sleep.

i love my family. i love my husband. i love my baby. and i really miss my puppy, because he's getting less attention these days and it's breaking my heart. a post from him is coming soon. stay tuned.

happy friday and happy fall!

Thursday, September 22, 2011

a cool trick

my husband's new biking hobby isn't just good for his health :) the shininess of his helmet does wonders to quiet our baby boy.

so this happens quite often in our home now:


Tuesday, September 20, 2011

fall to-do list

i am settling in to the roll of motherhood, and it feels good. i have fallen in love with the lullabies his mobile plays while he naps. i'm in love with the way he needs me in the middle of the night. i'm in love with the way his eyes can always find mine and derek's now. i love bathtime. it might be my favorite. i love making my coffee a little earlier than i used to because i've been up, well, all night. his eyes are bright when he's awake. his hands squeeze mine as he eats or falls asleep in my arms. his pacifier is in a constant sucking motion as he drifts off into dreamland. he hold his hands in front of his chest like he's making an important decision. he quiets when his daddy touches his nose to his. he thinks about smiling at me when i smile at him. it's coming, i can tell.

with that said, i have never been more excited to celebrate fall, now that we have a new addition to our little family.

i've made a list of fall activities for derek and me (and berkeley, but he's too tiny to actually partake in most of them), as i'm sure most of my friends have, because we're just like that. i'm actually a lover of summer, but fall comes in at a very close second. therefore:

-make these ribbon lights
-watch 'dan in real life' and 'you've got mail'
-make pumpkin muffins (check! we did this already, and hubby loved them. he had one for breakfast as a matter of fact)
-make a fort and hang out in it all night
-bake a pie for someone else
-make apple cider (check!)
-put together a puzzle
-bake a cobbler and have my parents over
-make a fall wreath
-take food to the bethlehem house
-go to the pumpkin patch
-decorate for christmas
-go on a starbucks date, just berkeley and me
-go on a starbucks date, just derek and me
-find a halloween costume for berkeley
-make derek's favorite s'more cookies
-make a 'thankful for' list

well, i better get busy. happy fall to everyone :)

Tuesday, September 13, 2011

on my mind...

-now that i'm a stay-at home-mom (for the time being), i need some music to listen to. thankfully i have a music genius of a friend, becca, who gave me some recommendations:

gemma hays
god is able by the hills campus in australia
10,000 reasons by matt redman
god i look to you by bethel live
the civil wars
lisa mitchel
kaleidescope heart by sara bareilles

i've got to get on this list and start purchasing some music!

-for many years i've heard of "the power of the praying wife". it sounded a bit old fashioned and "christiany" to me. until......now. i NEED that book. daily. let's be honest, marriage is way harder than i thought it would be (it's still wonderful, but i'm just sayin...). i can seriously say if i didn't have this book (and god), i don't know where derek and i would be. or where my mind would be. probably in a very bad place.

-my baby boy slept in his crib for a tiny nap today. that's a big deal, because up until now, he's been sleeping in all types of baby things (swings, his rock n' play sleeper, bouncy seats), and also our bed...oops. we'll try the crib tonight too! wish us luck!




-i'm a MESS when i take berkeley out and about. i HATE that his carseat has to face the back. i do realize it's the safest, but i don't care for the fact that i cannot see his face. derek bought me a mirror, but it's not the same. this is where god comes in, i don't have to stare at my child and will him to keep breathing. god takes care of that for me. chill, carrie beth.

-another thing, don't tell anyone, but i've started running again. yes, i picked it back up two weeks after giving birth. many people don't recommend this, but i read "running for women" kara goucher, who happens to be a professional runner, and she says that it's perfectly ok after a very normal, uneventful delivery (as in no c-sections, etc.) i've been DREAMING of running for months. and when i'm out there, i feel alive. i think thoughts like, i'm doing this, i'm really outside running again! i think the cars that drive by can probably see a huge grin plastered across my face. i've rediscovered the joy of running and it is fantastic! i think the break was good for me. and if i weren't running, how would i have caught this gorgeous sunset?



luckily i have a husband who will play with and take care of berkeley while i live my dream. thank you hubbins :)

"...running can be the highlight of your day, every day, and running for pure pleasure is the surest way to run well." kara goucher


so, these are just things that go through my mind throughout the day with just the two of us here.

i'm sure there will be more. i'll leave you with this....sigh.


Thursday, September 8, 2011

some mom things



1. this book is making me think. it's reminding me who i am. it is re-teaching me how to live. she's brilliant, yet simple. i downloaded it on my phone and read it at night when berkeley won't sleep, but he wants me to hold him and comfort him. since it's on my phone, i can "bookmark" pages, but i can't highlight, so when he's napping during the day, i go through the pages i've bookmarked and write down my favorite thoughts of hers into my journal. it's therapeutic.

2. being a mom is hard. i wonder when i'll be able to go a whole night without a lamp or a closet light on just so i can monitor berkeley's breathing. i keep reminding myself that i can rest, that god will watch over him while i sleep, but so far, i can't let go completely. also, berkeley likes to sleep all day and none at night, with the exception of 45 minute little naps. the books say to keep it quiet and dark in your home at night so he knows it's nighttime, but i get so bored, i just HAVE to turn on HGTV at some point. another thing, he's hungry. A LOT. he eats about every hour and a half to two hours. so that keeps a mama busy :) BUT....

3. being a mom is the most wonderful part of my life so far. i love how he brings derek and me together. we have to team up to take care of him, and the result is beautiful. i like knowing berkeley and i are awake by ourselves in the middle of the night. it's just us and we are constantly learning about one another. he stares at me forever, taking in my features, memorizing the face of his mama. i watch him snooze, and adore each and every breath he takes. i love that he needs me to survive. if we are not together, he cannot eat. before he was born, i thought this might be suffocating, but now that i've experienced it, i have to say, feeding him is my favorite part about being a mom. we are so close. it's basically just like cuddling, and i LOVE to cuddle.

4. i miss the outdoors. i miss running. i miss going on walks. i miss spinning classes. i spend many moments trying to figure out how to fit these things back into my life again. but two week olds have no schedule, so i never know when i leave the house if he's going to get hungry or not. even if i've just fed him (this boy loves to eat). i went on a 15 MINUTE walk the other night on the golf course with my mom, and when we got back, berkeley was screaming and derek was trying his best to comfort and soothe him. the thing is, derek has no milk, so that wasn't happening.

this is going to be an adventure.

i was meant to be a mom. derek was meant to be a dad. roger (our dog) was meant to be a big brother :) we were meant to be a family.

Friday, September 2, 2011

fresh start



i love a fresh start. and because i've graduated college and am not quite in grad school yet, i don't get to enjoy that fresh start this year that usually accompanies the fall season.

so my fresh start will be with this new blog, along with a couple of other significant life changes. i've had a blog for several years, but considering the shift in my life, and the need for something new, i've created a different one.

one of the changes i've experienced this summer is one i won't be sharing. i will say, though, that it was an opportunity to know and depend on god more than i've ever had to before. it was an invitation for derek and me to work and pray more fervently for the good of our little tiny family.

....and the second drastic life-changing event is....

we added a family member!

welcome to this beautiful and adventurous world, berkeley james sherwood!!







we are in such crazy love with this bundle of joy. and i dream of many days to come sitting in front of this computer, holding him tightly in my arms, writing about our little life.

i've missed blogging. i feel welcomed home :)